Planning & Timeline
What Suppliers Are Really Asking For When They Want Your Timings
The timeline request is not administrative politeness. It is how a supplier works out staffing, equipment, travel and whether your…
Ruchika Sethi
Editor, Get Myself Married
Ruchika edits Get Myself Married and treats a wedding as a logistics problem with feelings attached.
Contact Ruchika through our contact page — mark your message for their attention and it will be passed on.
23 articles
Planning & Timeline
How Long an Engagement Needs, Counted Backwards From the Constraints
There is no correct length. There is a shortest length that fits what you actually want, and it is set by whichever booking has the…
Planning & Timeline
One Person Holding the Plan Beats Four People Holding Fragments
Most wedding chaos is an information problem. When the plan lives in several heads and three inboxes, nobody is wrong and nothing…
Venues
The Questions to Ask on a Venue Visit That Nobody Puts on the List
Venues sell themselves on a room in good light. The information you actually need is about noise, access, staffing and what happens…
Venues
Choosing a Venue Around Guests Who Cannot Manage Stairs
Accessibility is not a separate consideration bolted on at the end. It is a venue criterion, and applying it early usually improves…
Venues
Getting Married at Home, and What the House Has to Absorb
A home wedding removes the venue fee and replaces it with logistics, disruption and a house that has to function as a building site…
Ceremonies & Rituals
What Almost Every Wedding Ceremony Is Doing, Whatever Tradition It Belongs To
The forms differ enormously. Underneath them, most ceremonies are performing a small number of the same functions, and recognising…
Ceremonies & Rituals
The Nights Before: Mehndi, Haldi, Henna and the Rites That Come First
In many traditions the wedding is the last event rather than the only one. The gatherings beforehand do work that the ceremony…
Guests & Etiquette
Why Families Argue About the List, and How to Take the Heat Out
The argument is rarely about the person being discussed. It is about obligation, standing and who the wedding is for.
Guests & Etiquette
Children at Weddings: Deciding, and Then Actually Saying So
Both answers are legitimate. What causes trouble is a decision that is implied rather than stated, and discovered at the door.
Guests & Etiquette
What an Invitation Has to Tell People, and What It Usually Forgets
The design is the part couples worry about. The information is the part guests need, and it is missing more often than not.
Guests & Etiquette
Why People Do Not Reply, and How to Get Your Numbers Anyway
Non-replies are rarely rudeness. They are usually uncertainty, a lost card or an intention to answer later that never arrives.
Guests & Etiquette
Building a Seating Plan That Works for the People Sitting In It
A seating plan is a social engineering problem with a deadline. Doing it in the right order turns three evenings of argument into…
Guests & Etiquette
Collecting Dietary Requirements Properly, and Why It Is Not Optional
Some of what guests tell you is a preference, some is a religious obligation and some is a medical necessity. All three need…
Guests & Etiquette
Gifts, Registries and Cash: Customs That Do Not Travel Well
What is generous in one country is impolite in another. The only universal rule is that guests want to know what is normal for you.
Guests & Etiquette
Divorced Parents, Estranged Relatives and the Diplomacy Underneath a Wedding
Weddings put every family relationship in one room with a schedule. The work is done in advance, quietly, and mostly by the couple…
Guests & Etiquette
Choosing a Wedding Party, and What You Are Actually Asking Of Them
The role looks like an honour and functions as a job. Being explicit about the job is the kindest thing you can do for the people…
After the Wedding
The Fortnight After the Wedding That Nobody Plans For
Collections, paperwork, thank-yous and a flatness almost everybody feels. Two weeks of it, arriving exactly when your capacity has…
After the Wedding
The Admin Sweep: Telling Institutions You Are Married
There is no single place to report a marriage. There is a list of organisations, an order to tell them in, and a few that genuinely…
After the Wedding
Returning the Hire: Deadlines, Deposits and the Morning After
Hired items come with collection windows that fall while you are least able to deal with them. Assigning this before the wedding is…
After the Wedding
Waiting for the Photographs, and Choosing From Hundreds of Them
The delivery time is longer than most couples expect, the selection is harder than it sounds, and both are much easier with a…
After the Wedding
Leftover Flowers, Food and Decorations: Decide Before the Night Ends
At midnight, nobody wants to make decisions about forty centrepieces. Made in advance, these choices take minutes and waste almost…
After the Wedding
The Day You Did Not Fully See, and How to Get Some of It Back
Couples experience their own wedding in fragments. Some of what you missed is recoverable, and some of it never was, which is worth…